Farewell to Great Icons

I would just like to say farewell to two icons of Generation X: Michael Jackson and Farrah Fawcett. They have made great contributions in this world, especially in the entertainment industry.

God speed to both of you!


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Speaking Jitters 2

In my previous post, I've mentioned about Dr. Orman's principles of overcoming public speaking fear. Now, let's continue on to the next principle.
Enjoy! ^-^

Principle #2 -- You Don't have to be Brilliant or Perfect to Succeed

Many of us have observed public speakers and thought to ourselves "Wow, I could never be that smart, calm, witty, entertaining, polished . . . or whatever." Well, I've got news for you-- you don't have to be brilliant, witty, or perfect to succeed. That is not what public speaking is all about. I know it may look that way, but it's not. You can be average. You can be below average. You can make mistakes, get tongue-tied, or forget whole segments of your talk. You can even tell no jokes at all and still be successful.

It all depends on how you, and your audience, define "success." Believe me, your audience doesn't expect perfection. I used to think most audiences did, but I was wrong! Before I discovered this, I used to put incredible pressure on myself to deliver a perfect performance. I worked for days to prepare a talk. I stayed up nights worrying about making mistakes. I spent hours and hours rehearsing what I was going to say. And you know what? All this did was make me even more anxious! The more perfect I tried to be, the worse I did! It was all very disheartening (not to mention unnecessary).

The essence of public speaking is this: give your audience something of value. That's all there is to it. If people in your audience walk away with something (anything) of value, they will consider you a success. If they walk away feeling better about themselves, feeling better about some job they have to do, they will consider you a success. If they walk away feeling happy or entertained, they will consider their time with you worthwhile.

Even if you pass out, get tongue-tied, or say something stupid during your talk . . . they won't care! As long as they get something of value, they will be thankful.

They don't even need to feel good to consider you a success. If you criticize people, or if you stir them up to ultimately benefit them, they might still appreciate you, even though you didn't make them feel good at the time.

Speaking Jitters

Speaking to a lot of people gives me the shivers every time. The moment I step up the stage, or in front of my peers, my knees start to shake, my hands feel cold, and my heart beats like mad. Ever had this feeling? Somehow, I survived each experience *whew!*. Thanks to the tips I got from an article on conquering public speaking fear written by Morton C. Orman, M.D. In his article he discussed 10 principles we have to remember about public speaking. I would like to share these principles right here. For today, I'll post the first of ten principles by Dr. Orman.

Principle #1 -- Speaking in Public is NOT Inherently Stressful

Most of us believe parts of life are inherently stressful. In fact, most of us have been taught to believe that life as a whole is very stressful!

To deal with any type of stress effectively, you first must understand that life itself, including public speaking, is NOT inherently stressful. Thousands of human beings have learned to speak in front of groups with little or no stress at all. Many of these people were initially terrified to speak in public. Their knees would shake, their voices would tremble, their thoughts would become jumbled... you know the rest. Yet they learned to eliminate their fear of public speaking completely.

You are no more or less human than they are. If they can conquer the fear of public speaking, so can you! It just takes the right guiding principles, the right understanding, and the right plan of action to make this goal a reality.

Believe me, it's not difficult. I'm a good example of someone who conquered the fear of public speaking. And while I didn't do it overnight, it wasn't difficult. All it took was approaching the problem in the right way.

English and Me

I remember way back in my high school and university days, I had to write one-page essays, about anything under the sun, everyday. Take note: EVERYDAY!

The topic did not really matter much - it could be something I've read, heard, or seen. Perhaps a dream I had, a theory, or something that's from my wildest imagination! As as student, I saw this as something that was trivial and not really worth my time and effort. (Aha!) But then, this was something I had to do - I did not have much choice because our English teacher checked our output everyday. @_@

One thing for sure, this particular exercise helped me a lot in making me more fluent in expressing myself in English. And I'm happy with the results... Yes, very happy indeed.

My undying gratitude to my English teachers who relentlessly encouraged me (with a few threatening remarks on the side) to do this exercise. Thank you teachers!!

=^^=

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